Wednesday 27 March 2013

Is It Wrong To Stick With One?

When I had Monkey the plan was always that we would wait until he was school-age before we had another child. I have poly-cystic ovaries and so had Monkey young, when I was 26, so that if the condition were to get worse in the next few years I could always look back knowing I had been pregnant and we had at least one child. 

My condition doesn’t seem to be getting a lot worse so I’m as confident as I can be that I’ll be able to have another child. Problem is…I’m not sure I want to.  

I’ve watched the majority of my friends have second children but the broodiness just hasn’t kicked in. Newborns are adorable but I still feel like I’ve been there, done that, not really sure I need to do it again. Plus, it wasn’t easy – why would I want to go through morning sickness, birth, sleepness nights (to name a few) again? 

However, I wonder whether that is just a really selfish attitude? If I am able to do so do I have an obligation to give my son a sibling? Is it wrong to raise him as an only-child if I don’t have to?  

He goes to nursery so has a lot of interaction with other children but will it benefit him to have someone at home, someone with him wherever we go? Will his development be hindered by not having a sibling – will he be a spoilt brat? 

I’m leaving this post pretty open-ended. There is no conclusion, no decision has been made. We’ll see what happens. Perhaps it’ll be like a new season, one morning I’ll just wake up and be broody? I’ll let you know.

3 comments:

  1. My hubby is an only child so he always wanted more than one. After we had our first, he wanted another straight away, because of me & then not getting pregnant for whatever reason I made him wait nearly 7 years. We now also have twins! eek yes I am mad!!
    My friend on the other hand has one & doesn't want anymore, she says her son has enough cousins that he can be close to.
    So if you don't want anymore then don't, but.... you can always change your mind xx

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    1. Ha! I think there is every chance I will change my mind. I think at the moment I just can't see how another child would fit in and how I would make it all work! x

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  2. I'm also really torn about this. My little man is my first although he does have two sisters (my husbands girls) so he's not an only one. However technically speaking he is my only one. Some days I would love another so that my little man has a sibing close in age to grow up with. Then other days I think I couldn't go through the early stages of pregnancy again or the sleepless nights. I flit between the two all the time. At the same time I can't imagine never being pregnant again or having the experience of giving birth (I'm one of these strange ones that actually enjoyed the birth). I think it's such a hard decision to make. I'm sure though that one day you will just know what is right for you! X

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